We recently traveled to the Kingdom University event for Drachenwald. We were full of hopeful excitement since many of our old Shiremates of previous years would be attending and we were really looking forward to seeing them again, as well as taking some classes. This was the first Kingdom level event we have attempted with our son. I knew from previous events that the Kingdom had Youth Minister to assist in ensuring that children also have a place to participate and have fun. I of course figured this would be the case here. The event had approximately 140 people registered and about 10% were children under 12. You kind of figure that someone would have thought of this, but sadly no. There was really nothing for small children to do at this event, and sitting through 1 to 2 hour classes for small children is just not feasible. The only place where our son could play and stay warm (it was pretty cold outside) was in the sleeping room which we shared with seven other people. Now, you would think that this would be ok because these people “SHOULD” be going to classes. However, several of these people wished either to sleep in or to take a long nap before court and feast. So this left us with pretty much no where we could take our son. Now, we weren’t looking for someone to watch our child for us, just a place where he could be a child. Our question: Where the hell was the Youth Minister, or a deputy, or someone to say “Hey we should do something for the children!” Sadly like most in the SCA (at least as I’ve seen it) everyone only thought of things for the adults. I had one mother say to me on her arrival, “I hope my children stay asleep so I can be an adult for a while.”, and this coming from a Royal Peer.
Now if the family-unfriendliness were the only problem we felt then I probably wouldn’t be commenting about this here, sadly that was not the only problem at the event. This one was much more personal. There was a Royal Peer at the event who I’ve known since I’ve moved to the Munich area. He was a member of our shire and he and his lady were friends with me and mine. So much so that he stood as my Best Man at our wedding. They ended moving away to the Barony of Knights Crossing just before our wedding. We hadn’t seen them in a couple of years and we were really excited about seeing them again. During the time we hadn’t seen them, he was Knighted, and then they won Crown. Although there was a greeting (even with a hug) there was no real warmth in the greeting. More distant and forced as though they were only going through the motions. I had hoped to talk to him about a previous conversation we had had about Chivarly some years before. I didn’t even get a chance to bring it up. I asked my wife later how she felt about seeing our old friends again, thinking maybe it was just me. She also felt that our old friends treated us as though we weren’t worth their time. In my mind and heart at least if you are friends with someone it doesn’t matter if they were Knighted or not, or if they had won Crown or not. They are friends to be treated with warmth and respect. If they are friends that I have not seen for sometime of course I would find a way to sit down and talk with them about what is new in their lives or what they are currently doing, and most especially what has happened since we last saw each other.
My wife and I have pretty much decided that if this is what the SCA is about then maybe we don’t want to be a part of the SCA, at least not here in Germany. Here, the SCA is not the only game in town.